Waking Up Cold
by Ramenism
Summary: Naruto and Karin sittin' in a clearing, she's tryin' to rape him and it's really, really scary. Oneshot.


Waking Up Cold

Naruto opened his eyes slowly.

Why was he so cold?

He sat up gingerly and scratched his bare stomach.

Wait.

Naruto looked down.

…why was he only wearing his boxers?

Naruto stood up and tried frantically to figure out where he was.

He was in a small clearing in a forest. As he looked around he heard a rustle behind him.

He jumped and saw that he wasn't alone.

There stood Karin.

Without her shirt on.

Trying to get her shorts off.

"Er…hi." Karin said, adjusting her glasses.

Naruto's face turned white.

He grabbed his head and tried not to scream.

_Ok, ok, Naruto…recap…concentrate…what did you do?_

He remembered…meeting up with Sasuke…fighting…with his teammates…Suigetsu, Juugo…

Naruto peaked at the girl next to him.

…and Karin.

And then he remembered hitting his head…

Naruto glanced fearfully at Karin.

Karin waved at him, now only in her black undies and bra.

Naruto shivered.

"Were you…did you…were you going to…are you going to…_rape_ me?"

Karin took a step back, blushing.

"Er…well…I wouldn't consider it rape…um, you would have been unconscious so you would neither be willing or unwilling…"

Silence.

"Ne, don't be afraid of me, Naruto-chan!" Karin smiled slyly and slipped off her glasses.

Naruto unconsciously took a step back.

"G-get away from me, you crazy woman!"

Karin pouted, "Aw…don't be mean…Sasuke-kun never pays attention to me, Suigetsu hates me, and Juugo doesn't really think about the opposite sex…what's a girl to do?"

Naruto felt like crying…he was too young for this!

Naruto covered his eyes with his hands.

Suddenly, Karin's demeanor changed.

"Eh? You called yourself a man?"

Karin gestured to her assets.

"You should be turned on by this! Do you even have a p-"

Naruto paled once more and grabbed his crotch.

Though Karin wasn't displeased by this, she asked, "What?"

Suddenly Naruto snapped.

"SAI!"

XXX

Sai sneezed.

"Sai, are you ok?" Sakura asked him.

"I'm fine. Let's continue to look for Naruto."

Sakura nodded.

XXX

Naruto glanced at Karin once more.

"Eh, Naruto, you like what you see?"

"Yeah. You have a hot body."

"Eh?"

Karin put her hands on her hips, "Then what's the big deal?"

Naruto crossed his arms, "Your personality makes me want to gag."

Karin stared, appalled.

Naruto scrunched his eyes up, "…the blushing…the crush on Sasuke…violent tendencies…it reminds me of someone…"

XXX

Sakura sneezed.

XXX

Karin flipped her hair, "Does it look like I care?"

Naruto ignored her.

Karin made a face.

"God, I'm throwing myself out here! I'm half naked! Hello?"

Naruto said nothing.

Karin sighed, and began to approach him.

"You better be better than Sasuke-kun."

This got Naruto's attention.

"D-did you…rape Sasuke too?"

Karin grinned.

XXX

Sasuke shivered.

XXX

"…maybe."

Silence.

Naruto screamed.

Karin pounced on him, impatient.

"Ne, Naruto-chan, don't be frightened."

Naruto screamed once more as Karin purred into his ear.

"SAKURA, SAI, YAMATO…SASUKE! ANYONE!"

Naruto wept as Karin tried to take his boxers off.

"Karin, what are you doing?"

Karin looked up to see Suigetsu and Juugo, but she didn't see Sasuke sneaking off too Naruto.

"Damn, Suigetsu, what are you doing here?'

Suigetsu put his hand on his hip and looked at her in mute disgust.

"…Naruto isn't even of age…"

Karin growled and got off Naruto, who was so happy to see the sharp toothed freak he could cry.

"Who cares? He's hot, and I'm frustrated."

Naruto tried to tune the conversation out as he wormed his way towards Sasuke. Sasuke pulled Naruto the rest of the way and the two hid in a bush.

"Thank you Sasuke!"

Any bad feelings between the two teenagers had been thrown out.

This was a matter of life or rape.

Sasuke rubbed his temples. "Just glad I got here in time."

"Ne, Sasuke…did Karin ever do…anything to you."

Sasuke paled.

"…I don't where this butt bow to make a fashion statement. I wear it because it had a special jutsu on it that burns Karin's hands if she gets too near."

Naruto stared at his butt bow in awe. He didn't know that's what it was for.

He had just assumed that Orochimaru made him gay.

Sasuke suddenly turned around.

"Naruto, I found your clothes."

Naruto sat up, "I've never been so happy to see my clothes!"

He rubbed his face on his jacket, "Oh beautiful jacket, I will never leaver you, ever!"

As the fox said this, Sasuke merely patted his butt bow.

As the two boys rejoiced, Juugo forced Karin to put her clothes back on.

"Arg, Suigetsu! This is not needed."

Suigetsu didn't even bother too look at her.

"It's either this or we kill you."

"What?"

"We may be Orochimaru's pets and we may have done some unacceptable things, but we aren't going to sink that low and let you rape a little boy."

Karin snarled at him.

Suigetsu smirked.

"That's Orochimaru's job."

The End

The Queen of Ramen

Ramenism

ho ho ho ho, I feel like this took the weirdest turn. And I don't like it very much though…

A gift fic for…antiassassinguy

I hope you like it!

Yosh!

I don't own Naruto!


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